This week the insufferable heat has got to the insufferable Dave and Joe, causing them to suffer, causing the quality of this episode to suffer. Is it a croissant? Is it a snail? Is it a sausage wrapped in bacon? Oh no, it’s an alien! (Hold on, no, it is a croissant).
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Following on from last week, we discuss some other inanimate objects that one could copulate with, reveal that Chinese poems could end your career and discover that football mascots could be part of a secretive guild.
Can you legally marry a building, we ask? Also, a brand new feature on football transfers (with theme tune), and Joey Barton treats us to a titbit from his autobiography learning us that it wasn’t all his fault all of the time.
This week Dave and Joe discuss the possibility of tattooing a replacement penis, discover that Roger Moore would happily tackle eight pussies (or even nine) and … John Terry. Yep.
This week Dave and Joe find out why some referees ‘knead’ to make some extra ‘dough’, give an in depth review to the 2016/17 season, and explain why divers will be punished and possibly humiliated. WARNING! This episode may contain obscene puns.
This week Dave and Joe are pleased to announce that Jesus is actually back (playing football), seagulls may now be eating humans, and that betting is more punishable than Kung Fu attacks.
This week Dave and Joe discover what Chris Waddle was doing in a sausage factory, find out seagulls have jizz, and learn that the Premier League is under siege from the Avians.